Personal?

Hey Guys and Gals,

I feel like I have yet to use this blog as a method of posting my personal goings on and my general life, so here I go. Are you guys ready to delve deep into the abyss that is Ian's complex and twisted social life? No. You're not. But, I'm going to tell you all about it anyway.

I'll start by introducing myself more personally because I have yet to do this through this blog. I am Ian Skelskey. I'm an average teenaged boy who is far from average.

I have a bit of a talent for all things mathematics. I love to do calculations in my head. When taking tests, I keep the calculator as far out of reach as possible for as long as possible.

I love music, but I have absolutely no work ethic, so although I was able to quickly pick up instruments on my own, I never had the will power to get good at them. I play guitar and piano... poorly. I am, however, quite good at listening to music. I listen to more genres than your body has room for; country, rock, rap, alternative, classical, classic rock, jazz, folk, screamo, metal, and whatever the sound is that babies make when dying. I'm sorry. That was terribly vulgar. I meant fetuses... or feti... or belly babies.

Speaking of unborn children, I have lots of friends, all of who survived the trip out of their mother's vagina. Most of them think I'm gay. When they say these, however, I stand my ground and prove my manliness in anyway possible. The first that I jump is that masculinity, in Latin, was feminine. By following this logic far further than I probably should, I prove by my femininity, how masculine I really am. I love Romans.

Matt is the man. He has been my closest friend since 3rd grade. I'm in fourth grade now... I stayed back. I like Brian. We are gay together. Happiness just flows through my veins whenever he nears me. And by vein... I mean main vein... or penis. Justin lives behind Brian. He's a puss. He has a thing for girls that are capable of breaking him in half... emotionally. His dick's longer than mine. Ryan. He lives up the street from Justin. Ryan's a white man... Well... a black woman trapped in a white man's body. I hate him. Now onto the females. Megan is mean and changes my facebook statuses... stati... more than one status... to obscure things that either openly express my apparent love to her or my lack of humor and surplus of humility. She's the second one this list thus far that is even remotely cool. Brian is a chick.

I take Latin at school.

My pants are wet more often than I'd like to admit.

Cows are my favorite animals.

I like to drink non alcoholic beverages and then walk around with the empty can pretending to be drunk. It gives me an excuse to be a douche bag. I do that at church from time to time.

I'll just leave this here...

Bye,
Ian Skelskey